Here’s my first gem
the first half of which is borrowed from Suky:
“There’s a reason people talk about getting married at the altar.”
Marriage is about laying down your life. I get pissed off when I hear stupid fools talking about how they can’t marry someone because s/he is not hot enough, has a subpar wardrobe, doesn’t know what mirepoix is/how to pronounce it or has never read Proust. The only person who can decide whether you enjoy your marriage or stay in it is YOU. YEP.
Not Jesus. Not your spouse. YOU. Jesus won’t force your heart, although he will respond to your prayers for more grace, more patience, more joy, more affection. And as for your spouse - in the end, no one is responsible for your feelings, because you choose the emotions you will entertain.
Marriage is a choice that you renew every day and at every juncture in your day. What I found to be true quite early on, and what continues to be affirmed, is that there is no middle ground between intimacy and a broken covenant. At any given point, you’re moving towards one or the other. Marriage or divorce - it’s your choice, and I’m learning to be quick to make the right decision. I’m learning to forgive quickly, to guard my belief in my marriage, to serve my husband, and to rejoice in every good thing we have. I intend to be married for a long, long time, until one of us dies or Jesus comes back, and that intention is something I have to maintain constantly.
Your spouse isn’t something you shop for. They’re not your accessory or possession; they’re not meant for your entertainment. They’re for you to cherish and serve. Your words at the altar essentially come down to one thing: no matter what your spouse does or does not do, YOU have made a promise between YOU and GOD that you will love this person for the rest of your life. You are laying your life down for your spouse and making them your first ministry, right after the Lord, for the rest of your life. You are telling Jesus that you want to learn his heart of faithfulness for the church through loving this one person for their entire lifetime, to serve them and love them and intercede for them in the way that Jesus does.
It’s not about you.
I’ll say it again, in case you didn’t catch that.
It’s not about you.
Whew. Got that off my chest. Now I’m going to finish my paper and pack lunch for my man.
She gives me hope about marriage! …And that is a big deal coming from me.
Awhh, Rue is so cute!!! :)